Friday, November 23, 2012
What I have noticed about relationships is this: we have become used to using personal services as needed and when completed we or they leave . Even if we have a long standing relationship around services rendered we deal with people on OUR terms. When we want them (their services) we contract for them, if not, no contact.
This has negatively impacted our expectations of relationships to the point that marriages and singles in relationships have NOT cultivated the skill of suffering long for any reason. Long-suffering is a fruit of the Holy Spirit that will never be developed until we employ it! If you develop the habit of only being bothered with people when you feel like it and isolating yourself when you don't feel like it, you're setting yourself up for failed relationships.
You have to have tolerance and patience in relationships be they with a spouse, parent, child or at work. You need the grace that comes from the fruit of the Holy Spirit to be able to manage your relationships well, you can't manage them successfully without it! The fruit or the result of having the Holy Spirit activated in your life is a life lived peaceably in all of your interpersonal relationships. This is fundamental if you are seeking life long relationships with others.
Once we understand that much about ourselves then we will know why certain relationships don't, can't and won't work out.
Time spent cultivating.
Time spent cultivating your relationships is what will determine the ultimate success or failure of it. Are you willing to put in the time? Do your actions reflect that?
Count the total cost before you contact people for their companionship. If all you want is to be serviced on YOUR TERMS then contract for that service. Don't lead others to believe that they are in a relationship with you because clearly you have other motives and that is how we define SELFISHNESS!!!
Posted by Bernice Bright Dickey at 11:23 PM